I am at a point of time where things just do not seem to be working out.
I find myself constantly in disagreements with Grumpy and my mum. Which make things extremely difficult. And to make things worse, work is full of shitburgers that I just do not enjoy it at all.
The only thing that keeps me going is my baby, Little Bambi. And does it make sense that I am working full time instead of looking after her? Probably not.
Maybe it is just me. And to help myself get out of this mess, I just ordered this book called Personality Plus online. God I hope it arrives soon! Not sure how long I can cope with all this shit!
Tuesday, 28 May 2013
Wednesday, 22 May 2013
11 Months
My Little Bambi is now 11 months old. This is the moment when I realise that she is turning one very soon, and growing up too fast. And yes, like any other mum, I am scrambling with her first birthday preparations.
So what has happened since her laser procedure? Well, unfortunately I cannot say that the results came out positive. The birthmark is still very visible and somedays, it does not look any better than what it was before. It pains my heart, I swear... the fact that I put her through that procedure (which did not improve the situation), but life is all about taking chances right?
Moving on from that, at 11 months, she has 3 new teeth that is growing on her upper jaw. The teething effects were not as bad as the first two. Phew!
She is a little chatterbox, and I just love her constant baby talk.. its the cutest little thing.. hearing her mumble and grumble.
She has not been able to walk yet, but I am in no hurry for her to walk. Only because once she starts walking, she will become a real little person and no more the little baby that I used to cradle in my arms!
Little Bambi started childcare this week, officially for two days. Overall, she went really well and I am so proud of her. The carers constantly tell me how independent and well behaved Little Bambi is, which is absolutely wonderful! I really do hope she gets a good experience out of her time there.
Also, at 11 months, while I am still breastfeeding, I said I would stop by her first birthday. And if that is the case, I should really start weaning her off gradually now... which I have not done yet. One of the things I am worried about the most is my weight! The fact that I have been able to lose all the baby weight, and still eat as much as I want.. is due to breastfeeding. Should I stop? Should I?
Last week we went to a studio to get our family portraits taken.
She is a little chatterbox, and I just love her constant baby talk.. its the cutest little thing.. hearing her mumble and grumble.
She has not been able to walk yet, but I am in no hurry for her to walk. Only because once she starts walking, she will become a real little person and no more the little baby that I used to cradle in my arms!
Little Bambi started childcare this week, officially for two days. Overall, she went really well and I am so proud of her. The carers constantly tell me how independent and well behaved Little Bambi is, which is absolutely wonderful! I really do hope she gets a good experience out of her time there.
Also, at 11 months, while I am still breastfeeding, I said I would stop by her first birthday. And if that is the case, I should really start weaning her off gradually now... which I have not done yet. One of the things I am worried about the most is my weight! The fact that I have been able to lose all the baby weight, and still eat as much as I want.. is due to breastfeeding. Should I stop? Should I?
Last week we went to a studio to get our family portraits taken.
My usually bubbly and cheerful Little Bambi decided on the day that she would NOT smile.. AT ALL.. during the entire photo shoot. Instead she puts on her most serious face. Like seriously..?
Sunday, 14 April 2013
10 Months
Little Bambi is 10 months old today!
At 10 months, my little darling had to endure her first procedure at the hospital. Tears roll down my cheeks as I type this. On Friday, just two days before she reached 10 months old, she had her first laser treatment for a birthmark on her left eye. The treatment required her to be under general anaesthetic, which is such an awful thing for a little person like herself to endure.
I have never spoken openly about this birthmark that she has from birth, only because it makes me sad. However, I am truly blessed because birthmark aside, she is perfectly healthy, and has such an amazing personality.
On a lighter note, at 10 months, she has been saying "mama" and "mummy" really well now, which melts my heart in an instant. She is so expressive, in ways such as clapping her hands, pointing her finger, and waving her arms! My personal favourite is when she listens to music, she rocks her body as if she is dancing. Its good to know my baby has musical bones (a trait she would have taken from me, considering her father is tone deaf).
At 10 months, my little darling had to endure her first procedure at the hospital. Tears roll down my cheeks as I type this. On Friday, just two days before she reached 10 months old, she had her first laser treatment for a birthmark on her left eye. The treatment required her to be under general anaesthetic, which is such an awful thing for a little person like herself to endure.
I have never spoken openly about this birthmark that she has from birth, only because it makes me sad. However, I am truly blessed because birthmark aside, she is perfectly healthy, and has such an amazing personality.
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| Little Bambi helping herself to my books from the mini library. |
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| Her passion for books |
The most important trait at 10 months that I will always remember, is the brave baby that she is. She handled the procedure at the hospital so well... and in fact, a million times better than I did. It still marvels me that a little person like her can be so strong and brave. She truly is my one true source of inspiration.
Wednesday, 3 April 2013
Easter Weekend
Two days before Good Friday, I was already feeling a bit under the weather. I was coming down with a cold.. and of course, what perfect timing considering it was the long weekend that was coming up!
On Thursday, my boss asked for my help with a workshop for the senior executives in my company. This workshop had a 7.30am start time! AHHH I told her I could not make it to work by 7.30am, only because I have to feed baby... Anyways, I express fed Little Bambi and was able to make it to the office at 8am. We were prepping for this workshop for a few weeks, and it was interesting. I think the only part I really liked was the breakfast that came with the workshop. After I was done with the workshop, I rushed off to have lunch with Little-Miss-Whats-For-Lunch. It was her birthday that weekend, and we went to a nice Japanese place called Ito on Bourke Street.
The next day, I asked Grumpy if he wanted to go to church, and he said No. He was sort of recovering from a mild hangover, because he went out for after-work drinks. Instead, at the last minute, we decided to drive all the way to Warburton to a Buddhist monastery as they were having a Buddhist festival. So we quickly packed all of Little Bambi's food, nappy, clothes etc, and we drove about 1.5 hours to Warburton. Grumpy was there to eat all the yummy food prepared by the Buddhist crowd, especially the Thai food. The irony! Going to a Buddhist monastery on Good Friday!
While we usually like to take a drive somewhere and stay for a few nights during the Easter break, we were not able to do so this time round because my brother Dopey and my Dad were flying back from KL to Melbourne on Easter Sunday. So it felt like we were just hanging around at home waiting for their arrival. My cold was not getting much better because I did not want to take any meds while breastfeeding. But I did catch up on sleep on Sunday, which was nice.
On Thursday, my boss asked for my help with a workshop for the senior executives in my company. This workshop had a 7.30am start time! AHHH I told her I could not make it to work by 7.30am, only because I have to feed baby... Anyways, I express fed Little Bambi and was able to make it to the office at 8am. We were prepping for this workshop for a few weeks, and it was interesting. I think the only part I really liked was the breakfast that came with the workshop. After I was done with the workshop, I rushed off to have lunch with Little-Miss-Whats-For-Lunch. It was her birthday that weekend, and we went to a nice Japanese place called Ito on Bourke Street.
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| This is a massive katsu curry! So yummy! |
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| Grumpy and Little Bambi at the Bodhivana monastery |
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| She can stand up now! My baby is becoming a little person! |
On Easter Monday, we had yumcha as a family with my brother and dad here in Melbourne.
And there goes our Easter long weekend. Too fast!
We all went back to work yesterday, and suddenly my mum noticed some weird red blotches on her skin, and it turns out to be shingles! Which is bloody awful. So I am staying home today and tomorrow, working from home.
Thursday, 14 March 2013
9 Months
Little Bambi is 9 months old today!
The only difference this time round compared to the previous months is that I was at work most of the day, instead of being by her side. I miss her so terribly much while I am at work.
Taking these month old portraits are becoming much more challenging because she will not stay still, not even for two seconds. She has grown bored of her toys (What Sophie??), and enjoys going to the coffee table and book shelf in the lounge room and taking things out with her little hands. Our lounge room is a bit of a mess during the afternoons.
Apart from crawling, she is able to sit on her own very well. When its bedtime, we put her in her sleeping bag, then we kiss her goodnight and leave her room. I will quietly open the door in a few minutes to check on her, and I constantly find her sitting up in her cot, just playing and talking to herself. She can say "Ah dahh dahhh" "Ahh mahhhh" "Na na na na na".
She has two teeth now at 9 months.
Her favourite food at the moment is avocado mixed with apple. Loves it!
Swimming school has its bad days and good days. However, she loves the play area in the pool, with the fountains, water cannons etc. I decided to stop her swimming lessons at the end of this month, especially since its autumn now. Maybe we can find another family activity for our Saturday afternoons.
She has learnt how to blow through her mouth. Sometimes it makes funny noises, and she loves it. I love it too. If only I could teach her how to whistle! Haha
At 9 months, I am still breastfeeding.
At 9 months, she has a passion for books. We read a lot to her, and she loves the touchy-feely books.
And, she is also potty trained! I think this is a Malaysian thing, my mum was very keen to potty train Little Bambi as soon as she was born. Little Bambi is so funny on the potty. She knows she sits on the potty to do a number one or a number two. And she does not want to be on the potty any longer than necessary. The whole potty process takes less than 5 minutes, and we are done!
Now at 9 months, time flies especially since I am working full time. Next up on my list is Little Bambi's first birthday party! I will make it extra special. But reasonable of course. Nothing over the top. Just a cosy little party for family and friends.
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| My serious Little Bambi! |
Taking these month old portraits are becoming much more challenging because she will not stay still, not even for two seconds. She has grown bored of her toys (What Sophie??), and enjoys going to the coffee table and book shelf in the lounge room and taking things out with her little hands. Our lounge room is a bit of a mess during the afternoons.
Apart from crawling, she is able to sit on her own very well. When its bedtime, we put her in her sleeping bag, then we kiss her goodnight and leave her room. I will quietly open the door in a few minutes to check on her, and I constantly find her sitting up in her cot, just playing and talking to herself. She can say "Ah dahh dahhh" "Ahh mahhhh" "Na na na na na".
She has two teeth now at 9 months.
Her favourite food at the moment is avocado mixed with apple. Loves it!
Swimming school has its bad days and good days. However, she loves the play area in the pool, with the fountains, water cannons etc. I decided to stop her swimming lessons at the end of this month, especially since its autumn now. Maybe we can find another family activity for our Saturday afternoons.
She has learnt how to blow through her mouth. Sometimes it makes funny noises, and she loves it. I love it too. If only I could teach her how to whistle! Haha
At 9 months, I am still breastfeeding.
At 9 months, she has a passion for books. We read a lot to her, and she loves the touchy-feely books.
And, she is also potty trained! I think this is a Malaysian thing, my mum was very keen to potty train Little Bambi as soon as she was born. Little Bambi is so funny on the potty. She knows she sits on the potty to do a number one or a number two. And she does not want to be on the potty any longer than necessary. The whole potty process takes less than 5 minutes, and we are done!
Now at 9 months, time flies especially since I am working full time. Next up on my list is Little Bambi's first birthday party! I will make it extra special. But reasonable of course. Nothing over the top. Just a cosy little party for family and friends.
Friday, 8 March 2013
First Tooth
I can't believe I have already completed three weeks of full time work. How does it feel? I am exhausted! It is really tiring. And having said that, I still have my mum helping us out at home. Apart from looking after Little Bambi, she cooks our dinners, does all our laundry, cleans the house etc. I can't imagine when she goes back to KL! I will be a mess!
My day starts at 5.30am, and I get everything done (breakfast/shower/make-up) by 6.30am. Then I wake Little Bambi up, and feed her. We are done by 7am, then I put on my work clothes. I help put on a beanie and a cardigan for her, then she comes with me to the train station in her trike.
Work is really hectic at the moment. We are just three months from Go Live in a massive project. This project is huge. Bigger than the project I worked on in 2006/2007. But then again, I am not sure if I want to be where I am right now. Each week, I stay back past 5pm at least 3 times and I find it extremely frustrating because I want to go home and spend time with my baby! I sometimes wonder if I should just ask for an easier role, a no-brainer type role. Then I can have my normal lunch breaks and go home on time. My new lady boss is such a busy person that because of her, some days I am stuck in meetings during my lunch hour. Having a late lunch is not that big an issue, but I need at least a 30 minute time-out (around 11am-12pm) just to sit in a room with a breast pump in one hand.
On a different note, my Little Bambi had her first tooth appear on Monday this week. She is quite late in the teething department compared to her peers. She is already more than 8 and a half months, and only just started teething now. Anyways, teething is not fun at all, for baby, or for mum. She had a bit of a temperature on Monday and Tuesday, and to make matters worse, the weather here is very hot at the moment. I got a bit emotional when I saw her first tooth cut through. It just means that she's growing up so fast and turning into a real little person now!
My day starts at 5.30am, and I get everything done (breakfast/shower/make-up) by 6.30am. Then I wake Little Bambi up, and feed her. We are done by 7am, then I put on my work clothes. I help put on a beanie and a cardigan for her, then she comes with me to the train station in her trike.
Work is really hectic at the moment. We are just three months from Go Live in a massive project. This project is huge. Bigger than the project I worked on in 2006/2007. But then again, I am not sure if I want to be where I am right now. Each week, I stay back past 5pm at least 3 times and I find it extremely frustrating because I want to go home and spend time with my baby! I sometimes wonder if I should just ask for an easier role, a no-brainer type role. Then I can have my normal lunch breaks and go home on time. My new lady boss is such a busy person that because of her, some days I am stuck in meetings during my lunch hour. Having a late lunch is not that big an issue, but I need at least a 30 minute time-out (around 11am-12pm) just to sit in a room with a breast pump in one hand.
On a different note, my Little Bambi had her first tooth appear on Monday this week. She is quite late in the teething department compared to her peers. She is already more than 8 and a half months, and only just started teething now. Anyways, teething is not fun at all, for baby, or for mum. She had a bit of a temperature on Monday and Tuesday, and to make matters worse, the weather here is very hot at the moment. I got a bit emotional when I saw her first tooth cut through. It just means that she's growing up so fast and turning into a real little person now!
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| I miss her so much while I am at work |
Sunday, 17 February 2013
A Working Mum
Today is the last day of my maternity leave. Well, my weekend was just absolutely perfect, so I guess it was a nice way to end my 8 and a half months mini-holiday/time-off. Grumpy didn't work this weekend or play golf at all, which was a bit of a change!
On Friday night, Grumpy and I left Little Bambi alone with her Nana, and we went to watch Silver Linings Playbook at the movies. It was good.
Then on Saturday morning, we took Little Bambi for her usual weekly swimming lessons. I attended class with her (in the water), instead of Grumpy. He just didn't have the heart to go through another crying ordeal with her. Before our lesson, we brought Little Bambi to the play area in the pool, called The Pirates Cove. They have water fountains, water cannons, slides, packed with kids, and we let Little Bambi have a play by herself. The water was shallow in some areas and so she could crawl on her own in the water, which she loved so much! By the time we got to our swimming lesson, Little Bambi was thrilled to be in the water, and she did not shed a single tear or let out a cry at all. I was such a proud mama! Hahaha I couldn't stop kissing her during our lesson.
After swimming, we rushed to my cousin's engagement party. Over there, we caught up with family over lunch. Then my mum spent the night at my brother's apartment, giving Grumpy, Little Bambi and myself some alone time. It was really good to be us three again. Not that we don't enjoy my mum's company, its just nice to have Little Bambi all to ourselves again once in a while.
For dinner, Grumpy got greasy chinese takeaway, and we ate outside on the deck with a chilled bottle of pinot grigio. Hehe the weather has been disgusting lately, very warm and humid at times.
At night, Grumpy and I camped/slept outside in the living room under the A/C. Little Bambi was quite tired that she slept through the entire night until the morning so peacefully.
This morning, after breakfast, we brought Little Bambi for a walk in her new trike, along with our much neglected dog. Weather was nice and cool this morning. Then we came home and let her have her morning nap. I was able to do some housework this morning, laundry, cleaning the showers etc. Then we went out to Nandos for lunch. Little Bambi is now strong enough to sit on restaurant highchairs. So we all eat our lunches together with her, which is quite fun! She's so chatty now "ah dah dah.. baa..baa...pstttt...psttttt eyyyyyyyy". Then again, we came home for her afternoon nap. And after she woke up, we brought her to the pool again for another play time! Haha yup thats two days in a row. We dunked her three times in the water and she was not frightened at all. Woo hoo!
For dinner today, Grumpy whipped up a seafood feast on his BBQ and we had my mum and my brother over. It is still a very warm night at the moment, lets just hope I get a good nights sleep tonight and be ready for a new challenge tomorrow!
Ahhh my new journey begins.. becoming a working mum!
On Friday night, Grumpy and I left Little Bambi alone with her Nana, and we went to watch Silver Linings Playbook at the movies. It was good.
Then on Saturday morning, we took Little Bambi for her usual weekly swimming lessons. I attended class with her (in the water), instead of Grumpy. He just didn't have the heart to go through another crying ordeal with her. Before our lesson, we brought Little Bambi to the play area in the pool, called The Pirates Cove. They have water fountains, water cannons, slides, packed with kids, and we let Little Bambi have a play by herself. The water was shallow in some areas and so she could crawl on her own in the water, which she loved so much! By the time we got to our swimming lesson, Little Bambi was thrilled to be in the water, and she did not shed a single tear or let out a cry at all. I was such a proud mama! Hahaha I couldn't stop kissing her during our lesson.
After swimming, we rushed to my cousin's engagement party. Over there, we caught up with family over lunch. Then my mum spent the night at my brother's apartment, giving Grumpy, Little Bambi and myself some alone time. It was really good to be us three again. Not that we don't enjoy my mum's company, its just nice to have Little Bambi all to ourselves again once in a while.
For dinner, Grumpy got greasy chinese takeaway, and we ate outside on the deck with a chilled bottle of pinot grigio. Hehe the weather has been disgusting lately, very warm and humid at times.
At night, Grumpy and I camped/slept outside in the living room under the A/C. Little Bambi was quite tired that she slept through the entire night until the morning so peacefully.
This morning, after breakfast, we brought Little Bambi for a walk in her new trike, along with our much neglected dog. Weather was nice and cool this morning. Then we came home and let her have her morning nap. I was able to do some housework this morning, laundry, cleaning the showers etc. Then we went out to Nandos for lunch. Little Bambi is now strong enough to sit on restaurant highchairs. So we all eat our lunches together with her, which is quite fun! She's so chatty now "ah dah dah.. baa..baa...pstttt...psttttt eyyyyyyyy". Then again, we came home for her afternoon nap. And after she woke up, we brought her to the pool again for another play time! Haha yup thats two days in a row. We dunked her three times in the water and she was not frightened at all. Woo hoo!
For dinner today, Grumpy whipped up a seafood feast on his BBQ and we had my mum and my brother over. It is still a very warm night at the moment, lets just hope I get a good nights sleep tonight and be ready for a new challenge tomorrow!
Ahhh my new journey begins.. becoming a working mum!
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